In addition to making new friends, I also ended a lot of existing friendships. Some were my choice and others were their choice. At first I was highly saddened by this. But soon I came to understand that these friendships really were not friendships. Just people who wanted to be in my life merely to be in my business and cause drama.
As all this was going on, some heavily strained friendships were repaired or are still in the process of being repaired. This has been an interesting process for me as I do not like people to be mad at me. I was really bad about holding a grudge, but I know know that really does me know good. I have reached out to people to see if they wanted to continue our friendships. Some responded back with a sweet "yes" others responded by saying they only wanted to be "Online Friends" yet I never hear from them. Yeah it's hard to go through that, but sometimes it needs to be done.
I would have to say that the most interesting thing to happen to me this year is me enrolling back into college. I have pondered and pondered this for the last 2 years and finally decided to go for it and I did. I applied at the University Of Louisville and I was accepted. There's still some bumps in the road to get over, but everything is pretty much set. I have been getting a lot of shit from friends asking why Louisville? Well the answer is simply this, IT'S MY DECISION!!!!!!!! No other explanation needed!!!!!!!!!!!
So in closing this, I have to say that I am highly thankful for the changes I have endured in my life this last year. Including the ups and downs. There's not much I would change about it. It took a lot of hurt to realize that I am slowly becoming the happy person I once was. I am thankful that I have changed myself for a more positive person. I am thankful for the new and true friends I have and the those who I was able to repair friendships with. I am thankful for my family who are so damn supportive of me. Most of all I am thankful for life. I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving, be safe and enjoy your time with your family, friends or whomever you're with!!!!!!
H. Robert "StubbyCub" Cooper
As mentioned before, Dad has been struggling with with his diabetes a lot as of late. there have been nights where Mom and I have been awaken to Dad roaming the house. Of course he has no idea that he is doing such things. I try to get to him before Mom does and feed him some beverage loaded with sugar and some food. Once calmed down, he is fine and has no idea why it's 4am and we're all up feeding him. The family convinced Dad to get the insulin pump to see if it would help and it did, some. That is until Sunday while we were watching Janet Jackson pay tribute to her fallen Brother Michael. I glanced at my phone to see Mom had sent me a text message reading "Dad had a heart attack, we're at St. Agnes Medical Center."
Me usually being the strong one out of the four kids instantly fell apart. All kinds of things went through my mind, what if this, what if that, and so on and so forth. We get to St. Agnes and meet Mom, she is the rock as usual. I ask to see Dad and i go back there to see him and when I get back there I am shocked at what I saw. There Dad is eating a cup of puddling and doing a crossword puzzle, WTF!!!!!! I guess that's a good thing. The next day, Dad had 2 stints placed into his arteries, one was blocked 30% and the other a staggering 90%. After another day of observation they sen t Dad home. Today, now retired, Dad is doing much better, he has become a lot more disciplined with taking a good watch over his diabetes, although with him home all the time, Mom and kill him for bugging her so much.
Moving over to Mom who has been suffering from her back issues for god only knows. Well her Doctor finally won the battles with the insurance company. Up to the surgery she has had issues walking, sitting and overall just being comfortable, so another surgery was something that needed to take place, and it did. This time Mom's surgery took place at Fresno Community Regional Medical Center. Surgery went very well and Mom was sent home a day early. Since being home, Mom has made a great recovery. She is walking better and walking less and less without her cane, Which is very very good news.
As for me.........Hmmmmm. Actually I am doing well. I have still had my run ins with pancreatitis and knee issues. As of right now, I am dealing with a kidney infection. The doctor seems to think it was something I had to eat (e Coli). He prescribed me some meds and they seem to be doing the trick. Regarding my knee, well let's see. I have recently been having a numbness in the inside of my right foot. Yesterday at the doctor's office I brought this up to him and he thinks it may be due to the inflamation in my knee pressing on the nerves. Plus he also said that he no longer wants me to lift heavy objects, walk for extended periods of time, climbing ladders, squating, you know all the things I do in my job. So now I have to do some thinking about school, which is fine, it just sucks.
All in all we are doing well, just some setback to overcome and we'll get there, we're too onry not too!!!!!!!!!!!!!
StubbyCub
- Location:Downtown Fresno, CA
- Mood:
chipper - Music:George Benson: Turn Your Love Around
You're a great guy, i hope your day is as awesome as you are!!!!!!!
StubbyCub
- Location:Fresno, CA
- Mood:
cheerful - Music:Stevie Wonder: Happy Birthday
Friday: Didn't have to work which was good as I was doing paperwork for school. Brian and I had a fancy dinner at Ruth Chris Steakhouse. They were running a special which was nice and kept the price down ever so slightly, LOL. After dinner we all roamed around the RiverPark
Shopping center. We ventured into Best Buy to waste some time and I purchased a dvd of one of my favorite movies "Juice" with the late Tupac Shakur. We also went into Border's bookstore and checked out some books, I was looking for some new music biographies to read and I found the biography of Florence Ballard of The Supremes. After leaving River Park, we hopped over to the Den for a drink. David the beartender gave me my usual Dr. Pepper and Brian who usually gets a Long Island Iced Tea had a Strawberry Lemonade with Abosolute. We sat out on the patio as the weather was freaking fantastic. A gentleman came over and shook my hand and said it was nice to finally meet me....................I had no idea who that man was!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday: Started off with my phone ringing at 1:32am. I leaped out of bed thinking it was Mom. I didn't even look at the caller ID, turns out it was my biological father. He was calling to tell me that his biker club was in Fresno for the weekend. I said I would call him later in the day and I did. Once up and awake, we skipped over to Homo Depot to pick up new plants, potting soil and pots for the backyard/patio. Once back at the condo, I helped unload the car and then I drove over to the Harley-Davidson showroom to meet Joseph and my brother Toron.
After visiting with the Cooper's, I drove over to pick up my oldest Brother Anthony and his two youngins Kyle and Ceressa. We went back to the condo and I began digging the holes for the five plants. It took some serious effort at the ground was rock hard, but I got the plants in. Ceressa fell in love with Petey and vice versa. Kyle put on an oscar winning performance of how scared he was of Petey, it was quite annoying to be honest. After taking them home, Brian and I stopped off at Fred and Wanda's to check on them. They were relaxing watching X-Men, Fred was looking very good 3 weeks after his heart attack. Once we got back to the condo, I popped in the DVD Juice, Brian had never seen it and I tihnk he liked it. After the movie we just watched tv and then called it a night.
Sunday: FOOTBALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GO TEXANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And that's all I have to say about that.
- Location:Fresno, CA
Today I cried. I cried because I lost my dream job in Las Vegas, NV being a "Millwork Engineer" because of coming down with another ordeal with the dreaded pancreatitis that has popped in and out of my life for the last 2 1/2 years.
Today I cried. I cried because I hurt my first true love, Paul. Due to my inability to be true to him. Due to my immaturity thus making him fall out of love with me.
Today I cired. I cried because my new Kia Optima was taken away from e because I failed to have the co-owners name removed from the title. I came home from a trip and the car was no longer there. I still have the key to the car as a reminder.
Today I cried. I cried because due to slow action of doctors, 2 years of my life was stolen away from me, I will never get those 2 years back.
Today I cried. I cried because I realize what a fool I was for not continuing on to California State University of Fresno like I had originally planned. I will correct that mistake.
Today I cried. I cried because my father suffered a heart attack. Although he is doing fine, I am still extremely scared, yet extremely gracious that he is still here with us.
Today I cried. I cried because I wanted to go test drive cars and look at new houses but Dwight my partner in crime and I are now over 600 miles apart.
Today I cried. I cried because I got to wrap up in my woobie for the first time in 5 months. I know I'm 30 years old, but my woobie comforts and calms me.
Today I cried. I cried my oldest niece Kayla is a freshman in high school. She is attending University High at California State University of Fresno.
Today I cried. I cried read about one of my favorite actors losing his battle to pancreatic cancer. He was a great actor and will be truly truly missed. May you rest in peace.
Today I cried. I cried over the fact that I know I have one hell of a long bumpy road ahead of me to get myself back to where I need to be, mentally and physically.
Today I cried. I cried knowing that my Mother would gather up a good nights sleep with me being here at the house with her. With Dad being in the hospital, she is all alone in this house.
Today I cried. I cried because somehow in my mind I think that my good friend Nick doesn't like me anymore. I know it's not true, but it's just the way I feel right now.
Today I cried. I cried because a friend who I love very much that I called "Sweet Pea" told me he no longer wants to be friends, but only online friends. We haven't spoke in months.
Today I cried. I cried after being turned down for multiple jobs in this city or in that state simply because I do not have my own transportation anymore.
Today I cried. I cried because I miss playing softball with the Off Chute Too team. Although we did not always get along, we always had a good time on the field.
Today I cried. I cried over my mother is in so much pain because of her back. Lord only knows when the doctor will get things in order for Mom to have another surgery to make her feel better.
Today I cried. I cried just from looking at some of my 7,000+ pictures on my laptop and remembered so many of the good and bad times I have had over the last 30 years, 7 months and 3 weeks.
Today I cried. I cried because I know that any day now, my sweetheart of a friend Cecilia is going to go into labor and welcome to the world her first child.
Today I cired. I cried simply because...............................It felt good.
- Location:My old bedroom
- Mood:
stressed - Music:Change: Holiday
- Location:Fresno, CA
- Mood:
chipper - Music:Whitney Houston: Million Dollar Bill
Mom:
Her second surgery has been postponed and cancelled and puched back more than she would care to mention. Her doctor wanted to do a procedure to place a spacer in between her L3 and L4. This procedure was to relieve pressure that cause Mom to walk funny, have massive leg spasms and just be miserable all together. Well Mom's insurance was not having it. The insurance fells that the procedure is risky due to the fact that it is stil relatively new. Plus there would be the possibility that the procedure would not work and Mom would have to have another surgery just like the surgery she endured in 2003. Maked perfect sense to us, well Mom's doctor (Who is a great doctor) is not giving up. He is doing everything he can to get Mom to be as comfortable as possible. So please stay tuned to see where this goes.
Dad:
Many of you know Dad as of late has been having many issues keeping his blood sugar levels on a decent levels and since my late health update post, there has not been much change. Over the last two months in my opinion it has become worse. Especially during work Dad's levels have been dropping without much warning to dangerous levels, getting down to as low as 20. Luckily since he works at a hospital he is quick to get medical attention. What really upset me is the other week Dad's sugar went down and he began having a hellish dream. Luckily Mom was sleeping in my old room and she goes down the hall to find my Dad wrestling and fighting her jewelry chest. He was punching it, pulling on it and ripped the door off of it, then he proceeded to bitchslap the lamp shade on his nightstand. Mom called to Dad and he pinned her up against the wall shaking her, but she managed to get away. Mom hands Dad a can of soda and he squeezes it so hard that it exploded all over the dining room. A second attempt was successful. The thing that upset us is that Mom never called any of the four kids. After some convincing, we Dad finally relented and got the pump for his diabetes, which requires a lot of discipline. I will admit that Dad has been doing very well with it, his sugar has been at a respectable level and he is eating better, keeping up with his shots, etc. So it's going to take som time for his body to adjust.
Me me me:
Since my knee surgery July 31st, I have had very good days and some really bad days. Sunday following the surgery I the knee gave out and I fell to the ground and smacked my head on the tile floor. Luckily I did not hit my knee, but gave myself a nice knot on the left side of my forehead. Surprisingly, the trip to Las Vegas did not affect my knee all that much. Don't get me wrong, it hurt some, but I was not dying from the pain either. Last Wednesday I had the stitches removed and one of the dissolveable stitches was slightly infected so the nurse completely pulled it out, piece of cake. Yesterday I had my follow-up with the surgeon to see my progress and for him to go over what he found during the surgery. The doctor said that he had to removed about 70% of the Articular Cartilage as it was that damaged. He went on to say that he had to drain a good amount of fluid. There is the possiblilty that within a year or two that I may need to have another surgery as everyday movement will continue to aggrevate the Articular Cartilage. I will start physical therapy next week.
So now you're all up to date with the goings-ons with us, I'll post another update in another month or so *BIG HUGS*
StubbyCub
- Location:Downtown Fresno, CA
- Mood:
cranky - Music:Michael Jackson: Dangerous
Brian and I decided to go on to Las vegas anyways and made it from Fresno to Las Vegas in 5 hours and 10 minutes. I called to let old friends from Las Vegas know that I was going to be in town for the weekend. Oh great, call me, let's get together. I called everybody flaked, no surprise, we had fun regardless.
One of the highlights of the trip was seeing the finished product of a project i worked on last year for the Wynn Encore. I created the construction plans for the workshop to build the wall fixtures for this high end shoe store, here are a few pics:
Working on the product
It's was so cool to look at this and know I had a hand in the design and construction process.
We stopped in at the Luxor to have lunch at BLT Burger, great food:
I loved this shirt so much, I have one of my own now WHOO-HOO!!!!!!
Later saturday night and after dinner, we ventured over to Treasure Island to see the Sirens of T.I. since Brian had not seen the show. Anybody who has been there knows to get there early to get a good spot. We found a great location and soon after this family with 3 bad ass children crowed around Brian and I, and I mean crowded around us. This family tried their hardest to push us out of the way but to no avail. The mother was making rude comments and had her children not been there I would have cursed her rude ass out. Right before the show started the mother sat on the ground and I wanted sooooooooooooo badly to fart in her face, but I behaved myself.
After Treasure Island we roamed over to Charlie's Las Vegas. It was so dead in there you could hear a rat piss on a trash can. Needless to say, we did not stay long. Heading back to the hotel we drove east on Tropicana as I thought about stopping in at the Eagle, it was just as empty, screw it, we're going back to the hotel and we did.
This morning I was ready to go, I didn't want to hang out with anybody, call anybody, I just wanted to go home. We stopped off at Planet Hollywood so I could get sugar cookies at Toll House. I swear you need a cigarette after eating those cookies. Soon after, Brian and I were on our way back to Fresno. I was quite irritable so I was hauling ass as I wanted the drive to be over with. It took a long 70 minutes to get from Las Vegas to the Nevada/California stateline, traffice was a nightmare.
Hyundai/Kia Proving Grounds just outside of Mojave, CA
Since I was a kid, I have been fascinated with these energy propellers.
I can this trip to Las Vegas was not all that great of a trip, but it was not a bad trip either. A lot of the "fun" was ruined by the loads of rude people. I understand it's going to be busy everywhere you go, maybe it's the way I was raised. It just seems as though many people there act as though they are the only ones there and how dare you be there the same time they are there. Maybe the Las Vegas trip next month will make me feel better about the city, especially since we are not driving next time around.
I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my pint and noticed that everybody was staring at me. Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod
We made connections with friends with whom we had only spoken to online. So it was nice to meet face to face. Another plus was running into friends that we had nice seen face to face in 2, 4, 7 and even 12 years. That made the whole trip worth it for me, not to mention all the good food that was consumed, LOL. I hope you enjoy the pictures.
Stubby
- Location:Villa Borgata Fresno, CA
- Mood:
chipper - Music:Rick James: Super Freak
While walking through the Colorado woods, a man came upon another man hugging a tree, with his ear pressed firmly against the trunk. Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what the heck are you doing?"
"I am listening to the music of the tree." the other man replied.
"You have got to be kidding me."
"No, would you like to give it a try?"
"Well OK." He wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it. With this the other guy slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry and car keys, then stripped him naked and left.
Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree stark naked and asked "What the hell happened to you?"
He told him the whole terrible story about how he got there. When he finished, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the ear and said "This just ain't gonna be your day, Cupcake."
Last night around 2:30am I woke up again in horrible pain and started the first of 7 barfs. Everything I ate today came right back up, including liquids. Finally I asked Brian to take me to the ER, first we drove all the way out to Clovis Community and they had a line out the door. So I figured i would go to Kaiser and as we were passing St. Agony Medical Center I noticed you could actually see parking spaces, so there we went.
This was a good choice as the waiting room was practically a ghost town. About 15 minutes into waiting I was called back into the first triage and the nurse took my vitals and this is what my blood pressure read:
G'night my friends,
StubbyCub
- Location:St. Agnes Medical Center
- Mood:
drained - Music:The Temptaions: Corner Of My Heart
